Inflated Celebrity Deserves Better Security

Dec 1, 2004 12:00 PM, LARRY ANDERSON, Editor

When cartoon characters step into the real world, it tends to get the attention of children. Such is the case with the current Burger King promotion involving a cartoon character named SpongeBob SquarePants.

A certain 3-year-old I know had never even noticed Burger King until there appeared a giant balloon of SpongeBob sitting on its roof. As soon as she saw it, she was ready to drag any nearby enabling adults to the Home of the Whopper.

If you multiply the reaction of one 3-year-old and her corresponding enabling adults by the number of 3-year-olds in the country, you would have to conclude that those balloons have been quite a boom to Whopper sales — and valuable assets to the business (valued reportedly at $500 per balloon).

And yet security surrounding the cartoon invertebrate has been sorely lacking — at least judging from the spate of thefts of the giant balloons. And the real-world press knows an absorbing story when it sees it…

• In Norfolk, Va., where the balloon character was stolen, “no one expected thieves to risk the danger of climbing onto the restaurant's roof to swipe the oversized sponge.” (No word on whether Spider-Man is suspected.)

• In Moab, Utah, “It took a visit by the owner's granddaughter the following afternoon for anyone to notice (the missing balloon).” Later they handed out “Missing” flyers, no doubt describing his constant smile.

• In Manands, N.Y., video cameras on the top of the roof indicated something was fishy when they caught the sponge-snatchers coming in and going out of the parking lot.

Of course the conspiracy theorists are already calling the cartoon crime wave a super-sized publicity stunt to promote the new SpongeBob movie. Bolstering that suspicion is an offer from Burger King to provide “a year's supply of Whoppers” as a reward for the return of the inflatables. It's an offer that led one Internet poster to respond: “I wonder if they waive prosecution or do they feed you Whoppers through the cell bars?”

Considering that the SpongeBob balloon has been such an important promotion for Burger King, more thought should have gone into security — maybe at least by positioning a LoJack inside his SquarePants.

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